Marie Antoinette's

It has come to my attention that a friend of mine is involving herself with a truly scandalous man who could ruin her good reputation. I fear everyone can see this man's true character except the subject in question. Am I being truly unfashionable by interfering in my friend's affair? Would it better to let occurrences run their course despite the possibility of her heart and reputation being tarnished? Or is this a case where I must interfere?

Yours,
Dumbfounded in Durham

Dear Dumbfounded in Durham,

You are stuck in the ever uncomfortable classic foolish friend scenario. Let's face it, Marie Antoinette had a good heart but she could be quite stubborn about ideas and opinions she formed especially on people. If a close friend or loved one was in fact becoming involved with a man off ill repute, Antoinette would let it be known!

Always friendly and courteous to her dearest friends, something would be said in private. Whether or not the friend would take queenly advice, is dependent on their own tastes. But if the relationship continued Antoinette most likely would not be involved in any way with the fellow. No dinners, parties or visiting hours would be spent on him.

Devoted to the friend, hopefully she would see that the choice was not in her best interest. You did not choose him so you have no obligation to entertain him. Without being rude, gracefully avoid the indecent fellow without letting him waste your time. With due time she will see the red flags, and realize friends make incredible character guides!